quotes, just for fun

[hasset]

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.
John Adams

If my theory of relativity is proven correct, Germany will claim me as a German and France will say I am a man of the world. If it's proven wrong, France will say I am a German and Germany will say I am a Jew.
Albert Einstein

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
George Burns

I believe that a scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy.
Richard Feynman (How about a nonscientist (Gore) looking at scientific problems and PROVING HIS DUMBNESS....hasset)

There is much to be said in favor of modern journalism. By giving us the opinions of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
Oscar Wilde (This one belongs with the Gore statement)

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
Douglas Adams

"Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window."
Steve Wozniak

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practise either of them.
Mark Twain

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. (another one about Gore)
Mark Twain

America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization.
George Clemenceau (1841-1929), French politician

Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say `lift' ... they say `President', we say `stupid psychopathic git'.
Alexi Sayle, British comedian

The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government, and I'm here to help.
Ronald Reagan

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
Ronald Reagan

The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.
Frank Zappa

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. (again....Gore)
George Bernard Shaw

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
John Quinton

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
Charles de Gaulle

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.
Tom Lehrer

People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.
Otto von Bismarck

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.
Fred Allen

The best argument against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter.
Winston Churchill

I think politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason.
Anonymous

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
P.J. O'Rourke

[dtothelux]

I really liked those quotes. Thanks so much.

[hasset]

(these are good ones too)

The Ten Cannots
by the Rev. William J. H. Boetcker

William J. H. Boetcker (1873–1962) was a Presbyterian minister and a political conservative, Rev. Boetcker is perhaps best remembered for his authorship of a pamphlet entitled The Ten Cannots. Originally published in 1916, it is often misattributed to Abraham Lincoln. The error apparently stems from a leaflet printed in 1942 by a conservative political organization called the Committee for Constitutional Government. The leaflet bore the title "Lincoln on Limitations" and contained some genuine Lincoln quotations on one side and the "Ten Cannots" on the other, with the attributions switched. The mistake of crediting Lincoln for having been the source of "The Ten Cannots" has been repeated many times since, most notably by Ronald Reagan in a speech he gave at the 1992 Republican convention in Houston.[1]

There are several minor variants of the pamphlet in circulation, but the most commonly-accepted version appears below:

* You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
* You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
* You cannot help little men by tearing down big men.
* You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
* You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.
* You cannot establish sound security on borrowed money.
* You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
* You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn.
* You cannot build character and courage by destroying men's initiative and independence.
* And you cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they can and should do for themselves.